Londan

A local bearded man who despite his white background resembles an Arab. He is known for his strange sexual desires and tendencies such as an attraction to the elderly, animals and inanimate objects. He is also a masochist as he gets pleasure from various painful acts even at the expense of his own well being although he never seems to have any lasting damage. He even goes as far as to enjoy severe beatings and shoving large, often sharp or scalding objects into his rectum. He also seems to have a degree of attraction to former president Barack Obama as he uses a T-shirt with his face on it as a cum rag when he pleasures himself. He also seems to posses a degree of supernatural abilities as he can appear without warning any time something even remotely sexual or erotic happens. Even if the event in question isn’t sexual Londan can figure out a way to make it sexual or creepy. Londan made a habit out of groping the gonads of Dawsons dog Zeus. This continued until Dawson had Zeus’s balls removed, frustrating Londan. Still grieving, Londan recovered the severed scrotum and testicles and after a failed attempt to reattach them, placed them in a jar. He currently uses the testicles as a form of stress relief. If he starts to hyperventilate when under extreme pressure such as being unable to secure funds for a missions trip, he places the balls in his mouth while he inhales.

Despite this few people in Phult0n seem to be able to see Londan as he is. He puts on a well meaning and innocent demeanor that fools most people into thinking he is nothing more than mildly quirky. His mother in particular seems particularly taken in by this act. Only a few people can see past this to his real self. It is uncertain but there maybe a connection between him and Uncle Byron as both are perverts.